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Preface

I am not a writer. Not sure that needs any qualifier, after all would a “writer” really start a book with that sentence? I am a father and a husband who has watched his 3 kids grow to young adults over the last 15-20 years.

Although it seems like every generation feels that the next one is completely different, with many more problems and doomed for failure…it would be hard to argue that the current generation isn’t facing some very new challenges, cultural issues, distractions and pressures on kids that were not around just a short time ago.

Watching the direction of life for today’s kids, how they communicate, interact with each other, relate to their parents and new distractions of life bombarding them every day, I have become increasingly concerned that we, as adults, either knowingly or unknowingly are allowing them to be pulled farther and farther from some very important components of life. Lessons, skills and qualities that could ensure independence and success are being lost in groupthink, trending behavior, viral media and the opinion of others.

Over the last 10 years or so, I found myself “checking” with other parents periodically about my feelings. Was it just me, or were others noticing the change in kids? How they were communicating (or not)? How they were being influenced by all kinds of different groups? How they were defining “friends” and what people in their life meant to them? What was their involvement in social media etc. Not surprisingly, what I found was that a ton of people felt the same way I did and although they may not have been worried about their own kids, they were at minimum, uncomfortable with the way and speed at which life was changing for all kids of today.

It was my own realization one day that YouTube, Instagram, reality TV, Facebook, Snapchat, memes, Twitter, vines, selfies, Reddit, Tumblr, texting, etc. had become such dominant forces in our kid’s lives, that it was the right time to send a message that sounded different. A message that doesn’t come from a group of people that our kids don’t even know, that is based in common sense and caring, that cuts through the constant storm of distractions and empowers our kids to be the best people they can be. Most importantly, it will come from us as a parent, and that alone will stand out in their world as more meaningful to them than you will ever know.

My writing is meant to be a message of encouragement for all parents (adults), and a statement of belief that your kids will rise above others as strong individuals of character. You may feel like some of my ideas are common sense, and you would be 100% right. But I believe that common sense has taken a back seat as of late, and bringing it up again, reminding ourselves of what is really important could have a tremendous impact on our kids’ futures. My ideas, as simple as they might seem, may instill in your kids the very qualities and characteristics that lead them to a secure and successful future, while others struggle.

Finally, a word about the title, Your Kids Will Lead. Could be considered a bold statement from someone who doesn’t even know your kids, but I absolutely believe it to be true regardless of gender, economic status, race, popularity, religion, athletic ability, academic level, personality type, physical appearance, family makeup or any other variable of a kid’s life. For clarification, my definition of “Lead” may not be what you are thinking. I do not necessarily mean, captain of a sports team, top of the class or student body president. It doesn’t refer to getting the best job, earning the most money, being elected to some position of authority, owning their own company or even leading a group of people. All of those things and great accomplishments in life may come, and I have no doubt that the qualities I talk about will contribute to successes like these.

However, in my mind, “Lead” has a much broader, more applicable, much more important meaning to our culture today. I believe that people who are dependable, reliable, trustworthy, strong, self-aware, charitable, steady, persistent, mature, determined, considerate, industrious, supportive, cooperative, secure, honest, caring and communicative are leaders in all aspects of life. Others are drawn to people with these qualities, look to them for guidance, count on them in times of distress, want to have them as friends and follow their lead in life. The kids of today that carry these traits forward will no doubt be leaders to others, whether they know it or not. They will contribute to a better world in ways that may never be recognized or rewarded. They will make a better life for themselves, simply by being strong and secure enough to handle all that they will encounter. And, in turn, make all those around them better, too. They will be the loyal friend, the “go-to” employee, and the strength for others in difficult times.

My hope is that this book will begin, or continue a conversation among adults today that spreads beyond parents to uncles and aunts, grandparents and neighbors, friends and co-workers. My promise to you is that you will find many more who feel the same way and want to make a difference, and I believe. . .Your Kids Will Lead.